The Disappearance of Madeline Williams
by freezinginbristol
Summary: They were fine, and that was the way it had always been. But when Madeline disappears, all America is left with are his own memories and mistakes, sorting through his brain to figure out where the line had been broken. That is, if there was any line to begin with. [Genderbent NA Siblings: Fem!Canada/Male!America] [Mentions of FACE family]
1. before (part I)

_He said he had found it in Egypt._

 _Of course given their shared age in dual bodies, along with height, weight, and the same gnawing curiosity of whatever their parents had in the drawers of their office, she wasn't all that ready to believe him._

 _Still, with the two of them huddled in a closet of coats and shoes while the sound of adults' conversations and music came through the doorway, riding in on the silver of light at the open space at bottom of the door._

 _The ring is too big on her finger, though she feels the sentiment as much as she can with a nine year old body and brain that confused her more and more day by day._

 _"He said it came from a time when man used to worship the sun and stars."_

 _They don't notice the approaching footsteps coming closer to the closet and his hand is brushing back the hair from her face when the door opens and two pairs of eyes look up to meet history and sorrow with a ring on the edge of two fingers._


	2. during (part I)

"Mr. Jones?"

America blinks, once, twice, and almost winces as the ticking of the clock comes into his hearing from where ever he was. The woman, a picture of rules and regulations, slides over a cup of coffee across the table, the file open on the cold table. He doesn't drink from it, rather his fingers brush against the edge of the cup and for a moment he wonders how much the contents would burn if he poured it on his frigid fingers.

"I-um. I left at around 7:00. And when I came back-" he stops, biting the inside of his cheek as she writes the information down in her notes, before handing it and the file to the man standing in the corner, who takes it with a small smile and a word of thanks before stepping out with the police officer into the main hallway.

It takes Alfred three times to get his legs to move.

He's actually more sincere than Alfred originally thought of him, and he remembers her eyes rolling in her hotel after the election, trying to placate his overprotective nature that seemed to come anytime there was a change with her- personal or political.

 _Play nice._ Those were her words as they stepped out into the hallway, and he lets her lead, all class and dressed in a gown that looked like the night sky littered with stars.

The night sky at the present moment is filled with stars and with cold air that doesn't seem to leave his bones even after he sits down in the seat across from her prime minister and the car door shuts.

There is silenced for a few moments, save for the hum of the car moving along the empty stretch of road it seemed further and further into winter wilderness.

"You know I wouldn't-"

"Bien sûr." America's slipping into French makes Trudeau calm somewhat and he leans further back in his seat, fingers tapping against his thigh.

"She's not one for flightiness." America says softly, eyes staring at the trees rushing past them.

Trudeau smiles. "Miss Williams has proven herself to be quite the soldier when it comes to anything in her field. Even with this."

America says nothing to that, and the silence grows before he speaks again.

"Do you have any idea?"

He wants to laugh at the question, because despite the confusion on both a political and personal level, he knows that she knows he's not going to give up on whatever this was for the time being.

36 hours gone was small compared to over 200 years of mistakes.


	3. during (part II)

_"If you're jealous-"_  
 _"Shut up. Have a little faith in me."_  
 _She only hums, moving back to fastening a bracelet on her wrist and selecting a pair of earrings while she can feel his eyes on her back._  
 _"It's just-" America begins, playing with his undone tie as he moves towards her, resting his hands on her shoulders, fingers brushing the strap that lay against her skin. Canada laughs, teeth gleaming in the light of the hotel room._  
 _"Is it because he's pretty?"_  
 _Alfred rolls his eyes and she only gives him a raised eyebrow. She sobers, of course, laying her hands in her lap as an unspoken invitation to the array of jewelry on the vanity before he moves, moving over to his bag and pulling out a small, long box while speaking. "Again, some faith would be nice. Besides," he moves his arms over her and she opens the black container to reveal the small array of diamonds on the necklace. "I'd like to him try and beat me when it comes to making you look good."_  
 _"Well after this, I doubt he stands a chance flyboy," Canada breathes, hands holding onto the box even after he's brushed back her hair before carefully fastening the object around her throat. "Do I want to know?" she asks and he feigns hurt, expression shocked._  
 _"It was perfectly legal...mostly."_  
 _"Alfred." she warns as she stands, moving over to the bed and scratching Kuma behind the ear, to which the large polar bear gives a contented rumble._  
 _"What? Can't a brother be kind once in a while?"_  
 _"Considering the amount of crime shows you have and the Bonnie and Clyde phase we both went through back in '78 I beg to differ."_  
 _"I still don't understand how two men can know we've done something wrong so fast." America ponders aloud, sitting down on the bed while she stands in front of him, redoing his tie. "Do I not even get a thank you?" he pouts, and she doesn't even crack at the puppy dog eyes he's giving her._  
 _"Me saving you the last dance is thank you enough, stupid." she says, pressing her forehead against his. "Although if you behave," she moves back as he stands and catches her purse as he tosses it at her, the two of them moving out the door and into the hallway. "I may be nice of enough to extend that limit."_  
 _America chuckles, grasping her hand to watch her bracket gleam in the light. "Unless you disappear, which you seem to get better and better at lately."_  
 _"I don't disappear. You just need to be more aware of me as an idea, rather than a concept."_  
 _"Spare me England's lectures, even if they are abridged." he groans and she laughs at that._  
 _"Play nice." she says simply and he presses a kiss to her knuckles before letting go, allowing her to lead in a dress that looked like the night sky littered with stars._

* * *

The knocking makes him jerk awake, head already aching from the mixture of alcohol and what little sleep he was able to catch.

America swears under his breath, sitting up from his position sprawled on her couch to move out of the living room and into the hallway, the polar bear already at the door. He opens it, the cold air almost as piercing as the green eyes that met his. England isn't sure if the groan came from the obvious hangover or just from his presence, but he comes in nonetheless.

"You look like shit."

America only looks blankly at the cup of coffee, listening as his father moves about the kitchen, much to Kuma's relief, given America had failed to actually feed him last night. England finishes with that, sitting down across from the other nation and crossing one leg over the other.

"Thanks." America deadpans, before seemingly out of nowhere, he's seeing packets of sugar being poured into the cup before England hands it back to him. He takes a sip, wincing at the rush of sweetness on his tongue and caffeine going into his system. His father watches him with a cool eye before speaking.

"What did you do this time?"

"Why do you always assume it's my fault?"

"Because any time she makes you upset, you come crawling to me in complaints and anger, instead of sitting here like some lost puppy illegally drowning your sorrows." England shoots back, and Alfred rubs a hand over his face in exasperation. "Did you have a row?"

"No."

America scoffs at his father's disbelieving expression, taking another sip of the coffee. "I don't know where she is. Here and then..." he trails off, running a hand through his already messy hair and staring out the window.

"Just vanished."


	4. before (part II)

_"I heard you talking in your sleep last night."_

 _A head with long blond hair twisted into a messy bun lifted from the passenger window to regard the person in the driver's seat as they drove. She regards him with an arched eyebrow. "What were you doing?"_

 _Alfred shrugs, " Just watching you I guess. I was already up and everything-couldn't sleep. I don't know. Didn't want to wake you but you, uh, you seemed sad."_

 _"Why didn't you wake me up?"_

 _America sighs, one hand coming off of the steering wheel to run through his dirty blond hair before placing it back and drumming his fingers against the surface._

 _Madeline chuckles, slipping her feet out of her shoes and placing her bare feet onto the dashboard, nearly kicking him in the face when his hand shoot out to run along the arch of her foot with a devilish smirk._

 _He sobers, and then turns his eyes back on the road before speaking again. "You just seemed in another place and I didn't feel like it was my thing to drag you out of it."_

 _Canada hums, turning towards him and lifting her arm to press her elbow against the seat, placing the curve of her hand against her jaw to balance._

 _"So you just let me suffer?"_

(and rooftops and cold nights and walking at 2am because he couldn't get those things out of his brain while she was forced to somehow expel out all of their demons and she can't breathe with him or without him-)

 _"But what if you've been through some catastrophic like, like, a storm or a earthquake and they're creating the disaster within themselves?" Words are falling from her lips in a wave of hums and sighs that makes him untangle from his web of muddled thoughts, and her hand has found its way along his skin, firm on the back of his neck before moving upwards and burying into his hair._

 _"You'd have to make it through, I suppose." he guesses and he gives her one of those blinding grins again at her searching gaze before she speaks._

 _"Make it?"_

(her other part tastes like winter and something sweet when she fucks him, something of a distraction from the other parts of her brain that tell her say no to this and Nicholas comes with a sigh and her stomach is a empty space where she curls next to his sleeping form and she wonders if Alfred can smell him on her the next morning at the world meeting but that doesn't stop the razor sharp looks across a table where the world sits and the disgust is evident in both their faces)

 _"So you think that people who suffer together are more connected than people who are content?"_

 _He laughs again, and there is the thrill of danger as he takes his eyes off the road to look at her fully, taking one hand off the steering wheel to grasp hers. "Of course."_

 _Canada's eyes move back to the window, laughter pouring out of them both as he narrowly misses colliding with another vehicle. eyes moving back to the space of road in front of them._

 _She can feel his laughter in her palm from where he kissed it._


End file.
